ok blog so ive been complaining so much about my life this time is about my social life, like wise no one cares about my life on habbo and its so sad well lie its just that im not special enough for them and this is just what im complaining my friendship is going downhill and to honest that makes me really sad and i stopped making art and ive been sleeping late all because i'm waiting and searching for someone who is specially for me and it's really hard and i get hungry sad depressed its like a mess of chaos you know my food decision is like my whole life of this food hallucination and this friend hallucination that are'nt real. To be honest my life is disaster..

I find it hard to relax
like its very hard for me to relax
and like my life is like chaos
Its like i'm allways dizzy
It's my complain , I know
But really I need more help than relax
I mean friends will give a little advice
And well Its time for me to get less time on the laptop
I want to give the laptop a lot of rest
I want to only use this when ever I need to
I hope my life will get better Inshallah

ireally need to get rid of my jjunk its so messed up and my room is double messy and i get sad hahah!
but seriously i'm really annoyed of my junk i mean i really have to throw most of it ITS REALLY ANNOYING GOSH

you know its not far from end of january and ive changed a bit, and i still dont like it

i really need therapy, its just very frustrating now its like i have to throw most of the junk in my drawer. I feel like vomiting yuck..

ya allah aku tercicir kenapalah jadi macam ini subahanallah astaghfirullah aku mahu bertaubat dari segala dosa bukan apa aku sudah leka dengan asyik berhiburan menyanyi lagu,Besar betul ujian Allah  swt

hi blog so this time im in Limbang and I have pets so right now i have to take better care of them like i know im like super duper lazy and ussally at 6am my mom already fed them so at 12.00pm afternoon they become slightly hungry so like i have to give more food to the other cat because maybe its pregnant again,And im glad that I dont have a boyfriend or kids or a husband right now never had one or kids because im scared i neglected them or even worse getting divorced that be so messed up and sad so I'm only focusing on me and my family because you know its already hectic.Why its hectic the main reason is because I'm not prepared so everyone has this tamptrum where everyone gets mad and neglected i'm mean lack of love or social. Because im not in college or having a job because i was scared of being bullied I mean I really need more help and im going to find the time to be organised and to be honest i'm really shy of vlogging and If i had a child that would be more hard  its because im not prepared so I know its hard and I cry even more but thanks to the social media it gave me more hope .I love playing with dolls you know I guess I dont mind taking care of babies.But they grow up to fast and life is moving to fast i just want to slow down you know fix my problems make some new friends socialize relax figure out the best way to take care of my problems and if there was like a child than I guess I would take better care and on schedule and make a time table in case i froget what I did wrong and I'm really lazy you know because in my mind I allways thought of crying screaming about is sorry ok because in the real world sorry is unfrogivable
I know my spelling is bad but I really need help and prayers to cleanse my mind again and to those who are sad or critically sad or depressed you know im just here to help reconsider im trying to help you and please rethink what have the important things im trying my best yo help but what i honestly what I want to say is im trying im learning im doing new things now and being alone jobless and not in college has just gave depression its like sitting in this room because im scared of going outside but eversince i have been vlogging im ok with this life. I really hate outside people assume things that are'nt correct to what physically look or dress because you have 'nt really asked them did you know?